The School For Spammers

Am suffering from post-publishing fatigue (helped a friend get her latest co-written novel off yesterday) so I would comment more ‘mindfully’ but I just can’t stomach writing about spam when it’s nearly time for turkeys, far too much dried fruit, nuts, marzipan and icing sugar, hot spiced wine and more cranberries than can possibly be good for you even if they ARE a superfood! And chestnuts! Mustn’t forget them… And carrots for Rudolf!
Spam at borrowed Thanksgiving (I know so many Yanks now)? Bah Humbug!

Tara Sparling writes

Well hello, ladies and gentlespam! You are most cordially welcome to the School for Spammers. You have been nominated for this illustrious course by the recipients of your grammatically bankrupt communications. Whether your spam of choice be a comment on a blog, Facebook or Twitter; be you a phisher or a troll; whether you are pretending to be a tax collector, designer rip-off merchant or a porn pusher – we are the place for you!

The aim of this course is to allow you, the Spammer, to more effectively defraud your targets, the Spamees, of their time, cash, or technical wherewithal, by improving the form and content of spam in general. We will do this by bashing your heads together until your astronomically poor English skills improve enough to let you back online.

Ready? Good. There are three course modules. Please complete all three. Failure to complete all three will result in instant death. Any use of…

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